It’s another late one. 00:05 and I’m up with my poorly baby. I panic every single time he’s running a fever, fretting that it’s something worse and I’ve missed the signs, debating whether to seek emergency help or not. I hate it. I hate this as I’m sure every parent does, but there are beautiful moments in these nights.
Sometimes, in the midst of exhaustion, being up late with a sick child can seem like a cruel joke. They’re always worse at night (as we are) and after a long day of parenting, a long night of parenting doesn’t seem entirely fantastic. But I’ve learnt that no night last forever, and these babies grow far too fast.
Right now, Reuben needs me like he hasn’t needed me in a while. I mean he is seeking comfort. My independent baby wants to be held all day and that’s, in a way, lovely. And whilst it’s not nice to see him in pain, poorly, clearly suffering… I do know it’s good to be his comfort, to know there’s lots of little things I can do to help him and I do my best to do them.
But, all the same, I really hope the worst of it is over. My happy boy isn’t so happy and that’s more important than the cuddles I’ve been missing.
With love, Rebecca ♡